Do you find yourself hating your job when you used to enjoy it? The past year and a half has taken its toll on all of us. For many, navigating work, parenting, relationships, health, and worry has left us on autopilot. You may be having a hard time finding enjoyment in anything, including the work you do.
When you start to feel unhappy with work, it's easy to think your two choices are either accept it, put your head down and work harder, or look for a new job you'll enjoy more. But sometimes, especially after a year full of anxiety, there's another solution that may be the answer.
You have an opportunity to try to find some level of enjoyment from your work again as you look forward to returning to some version of normal.
Listed below are four reflective questions you can ask yourself if your career doesn't bring you joy. You'll also find information that can help if you realize, as you read, that your current position isn't where you want to be.
Question 1: What are your values?
The first step to take to find joy in your work is to figure out what you value.
Finding your values sounds simple but just because it's simple doesn't mean it's easy. This isn't something you'll be able to knock out in a couple of minutes. You'll have to spend some time looking at what you prioritize. An easy way to do this is to look at how you spend your time and money.
Those are two of our most valuable resources. How you spend them tells you what matters to you.
You may be surprised at what you find about your values
Reflecting on this may even reveal some truths you hadn't considered before or are uncomfortable with acknowledging.
If this happens, you may be tempted to reject them as your values because you don't like what they say about you. But it may benefit you to embrace them and pivot how they show up in your life.
For example, if you find yourself spending a lot of money on food delivery, you might initially call yourself lazy. And you might say you don’t want to be someone who prioritizes convenience. But instead, you could pivot to see that the time you're saving by not cooking is time you can spend with others. This may be showing you that you value connection or love over self-sufficiency.
Question 2: Does how you spend your time and money align with your values?
Next, look at where your values don’t align with how you are spending your time and money.
Let's go back to our example of ordering food delivery regularly. If you are ordering delivery because you’re constantly working late nights at a job you hate, something needs to change.
If you notice that the way you spend your resources doesn't align with your true values, examine what you would need to change to feel like you are living your values. Here are some reflection questions to get you started:
Can you shift something internally in your current role, how you work, or what team you’re on?
Is there a committee or affinity group you could join to feel more connected to like-minded others?
Can you work from home or shift your schedule to prioritize something else you value, like a morning fitness class or being free when the kids get home from school?
Question 3: How are you spending your time at work?
Now take some time to look at how you spend your time at work. Much of what we have to do in our careers is not optional, but how we do it sometimes can be. Here are two questions to ask yourself:
Are you setting appropriate boundaries on your time?
Do you take breaks, get up and walk around, and socialize with others when you want connection?
When we don’t set timers on tasks, they can stretch out interminably. We can find ourselves making repeated minor adjustments because the work never feels done. This can be especially true if you struggle with perfectionism. But working in this way doesn’t allow us to feel accomplished. Instead, it feels like there is always more to do.
This is why it's helpful to set parameters, similar to when setting SMART goals, around the time you have to complete a task. This tells our brain that we are truly done with something when we move on from the task. If we move on simply because we run out of energy, it's too easy to think we have to come back to it.
Question 4: Is it time to change jobs?
Finally, if you find that you can’t make these changes within your job, it is time to consider a switch. If you enjoy working for your current employer, consider seeing if there is a different role you could transition to that would provide you more fulfillment.
However, if there’s no internal move within your company that would make you feel more joy than you do now, it's time to think about finding a new opportunity with a new company.
Here are some tips that can help you if you are thinking about making a change:
Don't wait until you feel desperate
Many women wait until they feel desperate and miserable before they make a move. When you do this, it can lead to taking a position that's not the right fit because you just want something different.
But if you are not careful, you'll find yourself back in a similar unhappy position a few months later. Don't let it reach that point. If you're unhappy or unfulfilled in your job and don't see an opportunity for that to improve with your current employer, start taking action.
Begin exploring your options before you reach the point of making a rash decision because you are so unhappy you feel desperate.
Think about how company values can align with your values
As you start exploring new options, keep your values in mind. Look for a job that allows you to live your values at work. And then take it a step further and look for a company with shared values.
Remember when you're job hunting that you are "interviewing" potential employers the same way they are interviewing potential employees. The job description might be the right fit, but if the company’s core values don't align with your own, you may quickly find yourself losing joy in your work again.
Before applying for a position, dig into the company website. Look for the company’s mission and values. Read their anti-discrimination policy. If they don't have one on their website, it might tell you everything you need to know about the company.
While you're interviewing, ask questions to learn more about the company culture. For example, if a company’s website says they value fun and community, ask in the interview how that shows up at work. The answer will either be blank stares, which is all you need to know about values alignment, or someone will say something like “Oh, every other Friday we end work at 4 pm and go across the street for company-sponsored happy hour and game night!”
When you find a company with similar values, it is more likely you will feel fulfilled and joyful at work.
Trust your gut instincts
Figuring out and getting comfortable with your own value system will help you identify the values of others easier. List to your gut when you feel a misalignment. There is scientific research supporting the brain-gut connection.
If things appear good at first but something in your gut is telling you that there is misalignment with company values, allow that instant to make you take a second look to find out why.
Yes, these steps will be more work upfront when looking for a job that brings you joy, but it will pay off so much more in the long run when you aren't looking for a new job every year and wondering why none ever seem to make you happy.
If you’re looking for more focused guidance and support on making these changes, reach out to a therapist at the New York City Psychotherapy Collective today!
Follow the steps below to get started:
Click here to share some information about you so that we can match you with the perfect therapist for your needs.
Have a low-pressure, 20-minute call with your therapist to make sure they are the right fit.
Schedule your first session and start on your journey to feeling better right away.
We offer specialized services for related issues like Anxiety, Depression, LGBTQ Affirming Therapy, and Therapy Specifically for Young Adults. We can help you feel less overwhelmed, more relaxed, and more like the self you want to be.