Summer is heating up, and if you're like many women, you're struggling with insecurity about your "beach body." You may be emotionally beating yourself up because you didn't spend the winter hitting the gym to be beach ready, or you may have started a fad diet to try to slim down fast. You may even be avoiding attending events because you don't like how you look in your summer clothes. It's time to let go of the "beach body" pressure!
It's time to delete the term "bikini body" from our language! It was first used in the 1960s as part of a marketing message to promote weight loss trends. Since then, it's done nothing but work on destroying women's self-confidence everywhere. It has left us feeling like our bodies aren't good enough, motivated us to jump on dieting trends, made us anxious to go swimming in front of others, and created unachievable goals. The quest for the perfect bikini body has also contributed to body image issues for many.
What is body image?
Your body image is how you see and think about your body. The National Eating Disorders Collaboration shares that there are four aspects of body image:
Perceptual body image - the way you see your body, even if it's not a correct representation
Affective body image - the way you feel about your body, such as the satisfaction or dissatisfaction you feel about the parts of your body, your size, and your shape
Cognitive body image - the way you think about your body, including a preoccupation with shape and weight
Behavioral body image - the behaviors you have as a result of your body image, which can include things like isolating or trying to change your appearance
When we have a positive body image, we can accept and appreciate our bodies. This doesn't mean there aren't things you would want to change about your body, but you are still accepting of the body you have. In addition, a positive body image can be connected with self-acceptance, high self-esteem, and healthier behaviors.
The truth about body image issues
Body image issues have become a serious problem, impacting people at younger and younger ages. Research by the Professional Association for Childcare and Early Years found that "anxieties about body image are starting in some children as young as 3."
You may have struggled with your thoughts and feelings around your body for as long as you can remember, or it may be something you started experiencing more recently due to a physical change. For example, you may have recently had your first child and are grappling with how to feel confident in your changed body. Or maybe you gained weight during the pandemic and struggle to feel confident at your current weight.
Here are some warning signs of negative body image:
Constantly comparing your body to other people's
Scanning rooms to see where your body size falls on the continuum of those around you
Continually checking your weight or how you look in the mirror
Obsessing over food, calories, dieting, or exercise
Canceling plans because you don't like the way your clothes look on you
Experiencing jealousy of others due to comparing your weight or body shape to theirs
Experiencing feelings of shame or guilt related to what you eat
It probably doesn't surprise you that many women struggle with body image issues. After all, when we constantly have to see perfect-looking models in advertisements, it may feel hard not to compare yourself and feel like you're coming up short. But it may surprise you that models aren't exempt from body image issues either. A study found that while models have a more realistic view of their bodies, they also have body image concerns. This means that the people you are comparing yourself to also struggle to feel good about how they look, which means even if you looked exactly like you wished you did, it wouldn't necessarily make your body image concerns disappear.
How a negative body image may impact you
How you think and feel about your body can impact your life more than you might realize. Here are some of the common outcomes of a negative body image:
Relationship struggles
Disordered eating
Lower self-esteem
Isolation
Perfectionist tendencies
There are many different reasons women begin to struggle with their body image, but thankfully there are things we can all do to feel good about ourselves and confident in our bodies. Here are five ways you can let go of the beach body pressure this summer and enjoy the body you have:
1. Evaluate the comparisons you are making
Comparison, in and of itself, is not a bad thing. The type of comparisons you are making and what you choose to do with them makes them good or bad. Comparison is negative when you compare yourself to another person and walk away feeling defeated and bad about yourself. But comparison can be positive if it inspires you to make a positive change and build confidence in yourself.
For example, if you hit the beach and begin feeling insecure about yourself because you are comparing yourself to women with body types you wish you had, your comparisons aren't healthy. However, if you hit the beach and feel your confidence building as you see women enjoying themselves in a swimsuit regardless of their body type or size, your comparisons can be helpful. It can encourage you to begin letting go of body insecurity so you can enjoy your time at the beach.
These types of comparisons don't just happen at the beach either. They happen when we walk down the sidewalk, look around the boardroom, walk into the gym, and scroll through social media. So be intentional about catching the comparisons you make throughout the day to see if they are helping you or leading to emotional pain.
2. Develop a healthy relationship with food
If eating wasn't already a big enough challenge for people, the pandemic added another obstacle to having a healthy relationship with food. Research has found "a marked increase of irregular eating patterns since the pandemic's beginning." These irregular eating patterns included emotional eating to cope with stress and negative emotions, boredom-induced overeating, restrictive eating from food insecurity, and overeating due to increased availability of being home all day with food options.
You need to eat to support your body and your mood. Depriving your body of food so you don't look "fat" can be treacherous for your physical health. It can also negatively affect your mental health by causing increased irritability and irrational thinking.
Choose foods that nourish your body and help you feel your best. Avoid foods that leave you feeling bloated and fatigued. Instead, select foods that allow you to have energy and participate in the activities you enjoy.
3. Tune out media and modeling advertisements
While we are starting to see more representation of all different body shapes and sizes in advertisements and even store mannequins, we still have lots of room for improvement. If this is an area where you struggle, have you ever stopped to consider that it's a bikini model or fitness model's job to look the way they do?
They make money by keeping themselves looking fit. They have access to nutritionists, posing specialists, trainers, and editing professionals to help them look the way they do in the photographs. And while there is nothing wrong with models being able to do that, it doesn't mean you need to look like they do to feel good in your skin.
Limit the amount of time you spend exposing yourself to images you struggle to match, and instead, embrace spending time with the people around you.
4. Have a gameplan for choosing summer clothing
If last year's dress is just a little too tight, or you know you need to find a swimsuit but have anxiety over trying them on, it's time to make a game plan for your clothes. Start by thinking about what patterns and colors boost your confidence. Then think about the way you want your clothes to fit.
Remember, you want to feel comfortable in your clothes to have the best experience wherever you are. If you're constantly thinking about pulling down this part of your shirt or fixing that part of your suit, your clothing will be a distraction, which can hurt your confidence levels. Think about the types of activities you might participate in while wearing that outfit to ensure you wear something that lets you feel confident and prepared for the situation.
It can also help to choose clothes that emphasize the parts of your body you like the most. Let your clothing communicate your personality.
5. Work with a therapist
Here at the New York City Psychotherapy Collective, we specialize in working with anyone who wants to make positive changes in their lives. Common challenges we help people address include emotional eating, body image, and self-esteem issues. We want to help you learn how to feel confident in your skin, accept your body as you are (even if there are things you want to change), and light up the world.
If you'd like to begin working with a therapist to feel your best mentally and emotionally, regardless of what the scale says, reach out today.
Follow the steps below to get started:
Click here to share some information about you so that we can match you with the perfect therapist for your needs.
Have a low-pressure, 20-minute call with your therapist to make sure they are the right fit.
Schedule your first session and start on your journey to feeling better right away.
We offer specialized services for related issues like Anxiety, Depression, LGBTQ Affirming Therapy, and Therapy Specifically for Young Adults. We can help you feel less overwhelmed, more relaxed, and more like the self you want to be.